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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27968681">my home is your body</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/softambrollins/pseuds/softambrollins'>softambrollins</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Professional Wrestling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Emotional Sex, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Morning Sex, Playful Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Quarantine, Riding, Teasing, lots of feelings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 15:21:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,073</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27968681</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/softambrollins/pseuds/softambrollins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean's heart has been broken before but it's still beating and Seth can feel it now across his bed and across any room and across the whole damn planet when he's not here. He can feel it in his own veins and it's like a constant, neverending promise, that <i>Home is wherever you are</i>. Dean will always come back to him like the tide coming in again, his body the shoreline ready and eager to meet it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dean Ambrose | Jon Moxley/Seth Rollins | Tyler Black</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>my home is your body</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I started this in May when it was very much a Quarantine Fic, and I guess it still kinda counts? Whatever.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Seth slowly drifts awake one morning, turning his head as his eyes blink open, falling to rest on Dean's sleeping body lying next to his. He's lying on his side, one cheek pressed into his pillow, so Seth can see his face. He feels a soft, content smile ghost over his lips the way it does every time he opens his eyes and finds Dean there, in his bed, like it's both a wondrous surprise and the most sure thing in the world. As sure as his own heartbeat. </p><p>He just studies him for a while and he likes when Dean's like this. Sometimes he still has that disgruntled scowl on his face even as he sleeps, brow furrowed warily, like he's fighting demons in his dreams. On edge and at the alert at all times. Always ready to spring up and throw a punch. But other times it's like that all falls away and he's just <i>Dean</i>, jaw slack and worry lines smoothed out, unguarded and softer and relaxed, his purest self. Human. More touchable than Seth dared to hope for a long time. Because touchable meant he could be hurt and Seth never wanted to be the one to hurt him. Not ever again. </p><p>Seth knows all of Dean's vulnerabilities now, every scar on his weathered body, every nightmare and fear in his mind, every one of the ghosts of his past that haunt him just like Dean haunted Seth once, and somehow all of that makes him being here, trusting him with all of himself, even more precious. </p><p>He'd give anything, he thinks, to keep him like this. He'd die a million times to protect Dean's trust, the pure, simple, fragile love he placed in his hands like Seth <i>deserved</i> it. Even after destroying it once. Dean's heart has been broken before but it's still beating and Seth can feel it now across his bed and across any room and across the whole damn planet when he's not here. He can feel it in his own veins and it's like a constant, neverending promise, that <i>Home is wherever you are</i>. Dean will always come back to him like the tide coming in again, his body the shoreline ready and eager to meet it. </p><p>Seth thinks he might drown in Dean one day and he'll surrender happily as the current drags him under. He feels like he's drowning in him now as his gaze travels up the length of his body. From the shallow dip at his waist disappearing under his gray sweatpants to the curved line of his back, leading up to his broad shoulders. His arms are folded underneath him, hands tucked deep under the pillow, which pulls his shoulder muscles taut under his skin, into small, undulating hills. Seth's struck by the not-unfamiliar urge to <i>touch</i>, to press his lips to his skin, to feel the way his muscles relax and contract and ripple under his hands like the ocean itself. Dean complains about his hands cramping up in the cold but somehow they're always warm when they touch Seth's body, like they've soaked up some of that desert heat and are just bestowing it onto him. His eyes keep moving upwards, gaze tripping over one bulging bicep up to his face. His eyelids are fluttering as he breathes heavily, obviously still dreaming, light eyelashes going golden in the morning sun along with his too-long hair and the thick, slightly unkempt layer of scruff covering his cheeks and jaw. </p><p>As Seth stares at him, perfectly happy to do this all day, Dean shifts over a little onto his back, with a soft, endearing snore, legs coming apart, and now his eager eyes are drawn down to the outline of his morning wood through his threadbare pants. He instantly feels a startling hot, prickly thrill running through his core, his own dick slowly starting to firm up of its own volition. He lets out a slow breath, his gaze heavy with longing. His mouth goes dry, his blood quickening. </p><p>Sometimes Seth's want for Dean rises up in him without warning like a strong surge of pure heat in his stomach that he can't hold on to, that feels like it could tear him and everything else apart. It feels dizzying and insane that he still responds this way just to Dean's body near to him. That he can't contain this mad, furious desire overtaking him. That somehow familiarity has only bred more desperate need. </p><p>He suddenly needs to feel Dean <i>inside</i> him more than he's ever needed anything. It's not even just about how stupidly, inexorably attracted every part of his body is to every part of Dean. It's <i>knowing</i> him. It's Dean knowing Seth, seeing all the dirty, unseemly parts of him and still choosing him. Wanting him. Lying here next to him in his bed on a chilly Sunday morning in December when he could be a million miles away, long gone, the way he would've been years ago when he didn't have a reason to stay. </p><p>No one's ever stayed for Seth before, he didn't think anyone ever would, and he's hurt Dean more than anyone and they've walked away from each other so many times and they've been through fire and storms and what felt like the end of the fucking world and still, he's <i>here</i>. Like Seth’s worth all of it. His forgiveness and his trust and his whole damn life. Like he doesn't see what Seth sees in the mirror. Like he sees something else when he looks into his eyes, someone worth saving. </p><p>Part of Seth has always known that he would never have all of Dean. And maybe that just made him want him <i>more</i>. Dean will always belong to other things. His first and one true love is fighting, throwing himself into wars, climbing every mountain in his path, taking everything they said he couldn't have and then some more. He's driven completely by that anxious buzzing in his blood that never stills, that compels him to engage in only the most reckless and dangerous of habits. Pressing your entire weight down on the gas and not easing up, screaming to drown out the silence, drinking until the whole world around you disappears, fists flying wildly at anything that moves, racing hearts and speeding cars, the squared circle and the open road. Uncertainty. Impossibility. Everything he can hit or feel or swallow or inject into his veins. The rush of adrenaline and the roar of the crowd and the blinding lights and the thrilling taste of blood in the back of his throat. The whole damn universe. Because anything else would mean a slow death, wasting away into nothing. That's what Seth's always loved: Dean Ambrose, all of him, even if he'd never be his. <i>Because</i> he'd never be his. </p><p>The world can't contain Dean Ambrose and it never will, so of course Seth can't fit everything he feels for him inside his small, inadequate body. </p><p>Sometimes Dean looks at him though, while he's kissing him or when they're just messing around in the kitchen or laughing at something stupid or just lying there next to each other, totally still, staring across at each other, nowhere else to go for once, no fights looming or flights to board, no pressing interruptions, like <i>this</i> could be their whole world, just living, existing, being here together, and he thinks it would be okay, the very thing they used to be so fucking terrified of when they were young and full of fire and relentless hunger and settling down felt like the worst fate imaginable. And in those moments, Dean almost feels like someone else too, someone that maybe <i>could</i> belong to him, <i>only</i> him, if he really wants it, if he keeps it held tightly in his hands. And he feels like he can scale mountains too, the mountains in his chest that seem insurmountable, he can knock them down to size and just examine them. </p><p>And they look like this: Like Dean sleeping comfortably next to him. Safe and still and warm and breathing. Like maybe he's not dreaming of some other world far away or sinking deep down under the weight and darkness of his past life. Like maybe this small piece of the earth they've carved out is just for this. Just for them. </p><p>Seth <i>knows</i> Dean, all the beautiful and messy and contradictory parts of him, and he wants it <i>all</i>. All the time. Mindlessly and unabashedly. He doesn't care if that makes him weak or greedy or selfish or just human, a slave to his own animal urges. Maybe just the thought of fucking Dean overpowers every single one of his senses and renders all his other mental faculties useless. So be it. Thinking's overrated anyway. </p><p>He slides closer to Dean on the bed, pressing himself up against the length of his body, gently skimming a hand along the smooth, firm line of his stomach before slipping it under the waistband of his pants. His skin is soft and sleep-warm and he can feel the steady rhythm of his breathing. He can feel him shiver just a little, instinctively, at the bare contact. Just his body responding to Seth's, with no thought or will attached to it. Like he recognises his touch. And something about that is enticing and exhilarating, stirring the already thick, warm craving deep inside him.</p><p>His slides his hand further down into his pants, fingers brushing over the coarse hair trapped underneath the layer of thin fabric, feeling the heat build between them as he gets closer in the confined space, nothing but skin and nerve endings and friction. And then he loosely curls his hand around his dick where it's lying tucked against his hip. </p><p>Seth's woken up with Dean's mouth around his dick more than a few times just in the last month so he figures payback is only fair. It was hard to control himself any of those times, and he supposes that was Dean's plan, and somehow this is almost as heady a feeling now. </p><p>He swallows hard, just holding him in his palm, eyes roaming back up to Dean's face as he just lightly rubs his thumb in slow circles over the head of his dick. </p><p>He can feel him rousing now, his shoulders readjusting on the mattress, arm jostling against Seth's chest. He moves his hips off the bed and then down again in a rolling motion, unconsciously stretching his muscles, and Seth's hand snags against him a little harder than he intended and, all at once, he feels Dean's body stiffen against him a bit. Like he's finally, actually aware of what's happening.</p><p>His eyes slowly crack open slightly against the sunlight as Seth just stares at him. </p><p>He squeezes his eyes shut tightly again, face screwed up, shaking his head, before he squints at Seth properly, barely raising his head. </p><p>"Good morning," Seth tells him casually.</p><p>"Mmm," he hums in acknowledgement, voice rough and muffled. "What're ya doin', Seth?"</p><p>Seth just keeps gliding his hand over him, feather-light, like his fingers are dancing over his length.</p><p>"Nothing," Seth says innocently, his tongue running over the inside of his bottom lip. "Just tryin' to warm you up."</p><p>"Doesn't feel like nothing," he says suspiciously.</p><p>Seth just laughs. "Well, I figured I owed you."</p><p>Dean finally eases his shoulders up, lifts his head upright off the pillow. He raises one of his hands up to his face, runs it through his messy hair, scrubs the heel of his palm over his eyes like he's still shaking off dreams, lets out a wide yawn that cracks his jaw. Then he flops back down on the bed like a dead weight. </p><p>"I'm really tired, man. Rain check?" he rasps, apologetic. </p><p>"You don't have to do anything. I'll take care of it," Seth promises, voice quiet and reassuring.</p><p>Dean just raises an eyebrow at that, even though his eyes are shut again, like he's curious about what that entails. </p><p>Then a moment later he just makes another low, vague noise that sounds like <i>Why not</i>. Which he takes as approval. </p><p>Seth eagerly responds to that, carefully shifting his body weight on top of Dean's, tossing one leg over his thighs so he's straddling his legs. He slips his pants down to free his straining dick and it jerks upright in his hand and Seth loves the solid, hot weight of it in his grasp. He can almost already feel what it'll be like when it's deep inside of him. His own dick is already throbbing with anticipation where it's digging into Dean's warm thigh. And he can't <i>wait</i>. But they have all the time in the world and he wants to enjoy Dean like this, all sleepy and pliant and perfectly happy letting him do whatever he wants, touch him in the ways he always wants to. </p><p>He slowly lets go of his grip on him and grabs both his wrists instead, pins them down to the bed on either side of him and just looks down at the expanse of his smooth, golden-hued skin, like the whole world is laid bare in front of him. And Seth wants it all. Dean just smiles up at him, eyes hooded and lazy, expression still sleepy and serene. And then Seth takes a breath and dives in. He leans down and catches his lips with his own, tasting, nibbling, licks his mouth open delicately, flicks his tongue against the tip of Dean's, feeling the wet heat there. He drags his open mouth down over Dean's beard a little bit rougher now, bites down on the line of his jaw. He rises back up and tugs his bottom lip between his teeth and pulls at it hard and Dean makes a hiss of pain and arches his back to follow him and lean up into the kiss, like he wants more, but then Seth lets him go. He falls back onto the pillow, looking even more dishevelled and debauched than before, mouth red and swollen. He looks disappointed but expectant at the same time, bottom lip falling open as he licks over it, still raw, still tasting Seth, pupils blown dark and wide. Seth releases his arms but he keeps them there at his side like he's looking forward to where this is going.</p><p>Seth just rests his hands solidly on his chest instead, anchoring him there just like his hips are holding Dean's down. He smiles down at him cockily, hair falling into his face, before he leans down to taste more of him, firmly planting his open mouth against his neck, sucking a mark into his skin. He can feel his pulse against his tongue, can feel the heat radiating off his skin now on his lips, the blood pumping through him like it's inside Seth too, like he can hold his heartbeat in his throat, the throbbing going straight to his nether regions. </p><p>He kisses a burning line down his chest, hands moving down to his waist, splayed over his sides, and his skin's already faintly flushed and pink and glistening with a thin layer of sweat under him, like his entire world going wet and ripe for the taking. And Seth <i>did that</i> and he almost can't breathe from how hot Dean wanting him this much is and he knows he'd do anything to see him like this, to be able to make him feel like this every day for the rest of his life.</p><p>He gathers his senses again and pauses to put his lips around his nipple now, blowing hot air over the sensitive skin, and <i>oh</i>, he can feel his reaction acutely underneath him, Dean thoughtlessly rolling his hips up against his body. It just encourages him more as he curls his tongue around the raised, pink nub and then bites his nipple, which he knows he's into, and Dean growls in his throat. And Seth just feels a rush of satisfaction, almost smugness.</p><p>He drags his mouth down his stomach, over the sparse, light hair leading down below his hips, stops to graze his teeth over his hip bone. And Dean's getting restless now, legs struggling to stay still under him, wandering around aimlessly.</p><p>He skims his fingers over the V of his hips and then he places both his hands around the base of his dick and runs them over his shaft. He's even impossibly harder than before now, beads of precome spilling out of the tip, and he licks his palm and uses the combination of moisture to slick him up until he's sliding effortlessly through his hand, fingers pressed into the solid heat of his girth.</p><p>He looks up at Dean now as he pumps his hand over him and he's just staring at him with a dreamy expression on his face, taking shallow breaths through his open lips, until he closes his eyes again.</p><p>Dean throws his head back as Seth keeps working over him enthusiastically. He's clenching his jaw and biting down on his lip, making familiar, pleasant sounds in his throat, that tells him he's enjoying this, that he's close, that he wants to come. He presses his hips up firmly into his fist and Seth stops stroking him off for a second as his own dick jerks slightly inside his underwear and he wants to touch himself but he can't, he <i>can't</i>, not yet, he has other plans. </p><p>He decides this won't hurt though — and he gently rocks his hips forward so his dick drags against Dean's thigh and he can't help the tiny whine of desperation that spills from his lips, eyes falling shut as he feels the small jolt of pleasure ripple though his body.</p><p>Dean makes a quiet noise of frustration now and he'd probably be rolling his eyes if they were open and he swears he mutters under his breath, "I thought you were taking care of <i>me</i>."</p><p>Seth lets out a huff and decides that Dean's gonna fucking <i>see</i> how good he's gonna take care of him now. Maybe it's kind of fucked-up that he still can't refuse a dare from Dean, even when it's barely there or half in his head. But he doesn't really care. Maybe this works because they're both equally stubborn. A little bit of friction, having to work for it, only makes everything taste sweeter in the end.</p><p>He slides his legs further down the bed, gets on his stomach so he's at eye-level with his dick and puts his lips on him instead. </p><p>He rests one hand on his thigh for leverage, the other hand wrapping around the base of him again, and he sucks the tip into his mouth. He licks over the wet, silky-smooth head, tasting salt, twists his head around to run his tongue along the slit of his dick, fingers squeezing into the pulsating vein on the bottom of his shaft.</p><p>He tongues at the ridges under the head just the way Dean likes it, slow and careful, feeling the muscles in his legs tensing up under him, like he's trying his hardest to hold it all in, his skin hot and body trembling slightly. </p><p>He pops his dick out of his mouth then and it's wet and red and shiny. He rubs his fingers over the base a few more times before he lets go, knowing the pressure is almost at its boiling point. It's all gonna overflow soon. But not just yet.</p><p>And then he lets him go and Dean's eyes fly wide open again like he's annoyed and he looks totally awake now. And Seth just shakes his head and gives him a smirk that says <i>Be patient</i>. </p><p>But Dean's not having it this time, which he should've expected. It's his fault, really, for thinking he could tame a wildcat and make it submit to his will. It's always going to show its true nature eventually. But he supposes that's what makes it exciting. He's never gonna get enough of this. Fighting for control every step of the way even when they both know that they belong, fervently and irrevocably, to each other.</p><p>Dean reaches up and pulls him down into a rough kiss, raising his hips to meet him again, as his fingers tangle in his hair possessively, keeping him there. </p><p>He moves his hands down over Seth's body as they kiss long and breathless, his skin tingling and feverish everywhere they touch, shoves his hands up under the thin cotton of the black tank top he's wearing, one of Dean's, running his nails over the length of his back which makes him gasp into his mouth and shiver against him. And then he slides them under his underwear so the stretchy black material slips off his hips just a little and he curves both palms around the swell of ass to pull him closer so that he's practically sitting on his rock hard dick. </p><p>And it's so, so close to what he wants the most, maddening and frustrating him, and he silently curses the thin barrier of cloth still getting in the way between them. He doesn't want to extricate his lips from Dean's, his arms braced on either side of them on the mattress to keep him above him. Dean's hands are still inside the back of his underwear, holding him in place, but he doesn't seem in any rush to <i>just fucking take them off already</i>. He tries unsuccessfully to shimmy them down even lower, rocking his hips backwards, seeking any meagre friction he can get against his needy, twitching hole. But it just seems to make Dean more keen to just get off without any further delay just from their desperate rutting against each other. </p><p>Dean lifts his hips off the mattress again and the tip of his dick snags at the crack of Seth's ass and he's leaking warm precome against his skin and it makes his own dick jump so forcefully in his underwear that he bites down on Dean's lip and his legs shake and he almost loses his balance and slides right off his body. But Dean keeps him there, readjusting them so his body's halfway on top of him, one of Seth's legs caught between Dean's, and Dean's dick falls back against his hip right next to where Seth’s is bulging out of the thin fabric. </p><p>Seth finally pulls away from him just an inch and starts trying to slip out of his stupid, restrictive underwear in earnest but before he knows it, Dean's fisting one hand in his hair to drag him down to him again and trying impatiently to reach down with the other and get himself off. Seth only just manages to stop him, brushing his hand away, and he gets there first, like some other crude wrestling match, gripping Dean's dick between his fingers but not applying any more pressure. He deliberately stops moving his hips so that he won't come in his underwear and ruin everything. But then Dean wraps his own warm, large hand around Seth's and he strokes them both over himself, fast and sloppy, and his eyes are locked on Seth when he comes all over their entangled fingers and Dean's bare stomach.</p><p>Dean finally lets him go and just lies there for a second, trying to catch his breath, before he casually reaches over to the nightstand and grabs a couple tissues to clean up the mess.</p><p>Seth just looks at him, his body propped up on his hands and knees above Dean, blowing hair out of his eyes. His mouth is open in surprise, eyes narrowed in annoyance.</p><p>Seth pouts at him. "No fair. I wanted to ride you," he says indignantly. </p><p>"What's not fair is me coming without even getting to take your clothes off," Dean points out. "Come here." He reaches up to rest a firm hand on his neck and hauls Seth back down to him.</p><p>"You're the <i>worst</i>," he groans, but he goes without resisting anyway.</p><p>"Hey, not my fault your fancy, elaborate plans failed. Maybe you should work faster next time," Dean says, smirking with a pleased glint in his eye.</p><p>"Shut up," Seth says, rolling his eyes exasperatedly, and then finding his lips with his own again.</p><p>Dean opens his mouth under Seth's with a long, content sound and their tongues meet and intertwine, hungry and filthy, until they can't taste anything else but each other. Dean puts his hands under his shirt again and Seth lets him tug it off his body and over his head this time and then Dean wraps his arms tightly around his waist and rolls them over so he's on top. </p><p>He slowly detaches his mouth from Seth's and Seth just stares up at him, not breathing, not blinking, as he reaches down and hooks his fingers into the waistband and finally, finally peels off his tented underwear as Seth sighs at the small release in pressure. And then he gently eases himself down the length of his body until his face is right next to his crotch. Seth just lies back and closes his eyes, going perfectly still, exhales heavily, waits for the wet, velvety-soft, plush heat of Dean's mouth to surround him where he's hard and aching for it. But instead he seems to deliberately ignore his dick altogether and he just firmly pushes his thighs apart before Seth feels the abrupt, startling absence of his body heat and weight above him.</p><p>Seth frowns, raising his head up, eyes fluttering open to look over at Dean as he reaches over the edge of the bed to grab the small bottle of lube from the nightstand.</p><p>He returns to his previous position as he generously slicks up his fingers. And then he reaches between Seth's legs, his other hand gripping the inside of his thigh to keep them spread, and runs his fingers around his hole, before gently pressing one inside. Seth clenches around him to keep him there, feeling all the arousal pool, hot and liquid and concentrated, at the base of his spine. </p><p>"I wanna make you come just like this," Dean says, meeting his gaze intently.</p><p>Seth just stares at him, mouth parted, licks his lips. He nods vaguely. Dean's fingers could make him do fucking <i>anything</i>, probably. And he'd be completely fine with it.</p><p>"Don't touch yourself," he warns as he presses in even further, adding another to scissor them inside of him slowly, his inner walls taking him so good and stretching nicely around them.</p><p>He fists his hands into the sheets, toes curling weakly into the mattress, and it's agonising and unbearable and probably the hardest thing he's ever had to do, but also — </p><p>But also, what a fucking <i>sight</i> it is when he looks down and sees Dean lying between his legs, fingers buried to the knuckle deep inside him as he just stares at him with the most focused, attentive look on his face. He has no idea how Dean isn't losing his mind over this, he has to be getting hard again already. Or maybe he's just blessed with some elusive strength that Seth doesn't seem to possess and he's been put on this earth solely to drive him fucking crazy. Both when he's fucking him and when he's not. </p><p>Dean slowly pulls his fingers out and works them back in again, one, two, and then a third, curling them inside him this time until he finds the spot that drags a wanton moan from his throat. </p><p>He drives them in and out a few times, finding a good rhythm until they're sliding freely without any resistance, and then his fingernails graze against his prostate and the slight edge of pain makes something new flare up inside Seth and his whole body shudders from the burst of electricity.</p><p>"You like that?" Dean says, looking up at him, tongue caught between his teeth. </p><p>"Yes," he says firmly, nodding. "Please." Telling Dean what he likes in bed can be a dangerous game because he always knows how to use that knowledge to his full advantage to absolutely <i>wreck</i> him, in the best possible way, until he's almost crying to come, but that's never stopped him from placing the ammunition firmly in his hands. He trusts Dean too, with all of it, his weaknesses and his secrets and his innermost desires and he's the only person he'll ever let deep enough inside that he can unravel him completely anytime he chooses, with just a touch or a look or a word, and Seth will only thank him for it.</p><p>Dean does it again, and again, pulling out a little before pushing in again. He's painfully hard now, each tremor from Dean's precise touch running through him straight to the straining head of his dick, slick with moisture already. His knuckles have gone white as stone, stiff and numb where they're clutching at the sheets for dear life.</p><p>"You need me to break out the handcuffs?" Dean observes, tilting his head at him almost curiously.</p><p>"Touch me, please," Seth asks, words hushed and strained.</p><p>"Are you sure?" he teases, clearly enjoying torturing him like this.</p><p>"God, Dean, I really fucking <i>need</i> —" he grits out.</p><p>Dean doesn't stop the movements of his fingers as he finally, slowly, leans down and breathes right over the top of his dick. But he doesn't make direct contact, almost like he's trying to get back at him from before, and Seth's gonna fucking <i>kill</i> him. But also, Dean being a total asshole and a huge, shameless tease really shouldn't be so fucking <i>hot</i>.</p><p>Seth nudges his knee into Dean's side impatiently. "Come <i>on</i>," he urges between his teeth, irritated. But predictably, that just makes it <i>worse</i>. </p><p>Dean tucks his face against his upper thigh, laughing breathlessly, and then he turns his mouth into his skin and presses a slightly scratchy, ticklish kiss there that feels good but is also completely infuriating. </p><p>"<i>Please</i>," he begs again, voice desperate and trembling. And then his fingers stop moving inside him for a second and Dean raises his head and locks eyes with him and Seth sees his eyes go big and bright, like a light's turned on behind them, like Seth begging for it, for <i>him</i> like this sets some deep, elusive part of him aflame that nothing else can reach. And then he nods and gently wraps his other hand around the base of his dick and Seth lets out a long exhale of relief.</p><p>And then Dean finally brings his lips to brush over the head of his dick and then he takes a deep breath and in one smooth motion, he opens his mouth and takes him down as deep as he can inside his throat.</p><p>Seth sighs loudly and lets his body relax, head tipped back against the pillow behind him. He reaches down to loosely slide his fingers through Dean's hair, settling them at the nape of his neck, as he bobs his head up and down roughly over him in time with the thrusts of his fingers, pressing into his prostate with each stroke.</p><p>Seth has no idea where Dean learnt to suck dick like this but he throws all of himself into it like he does everything. Like making Seth come is the most important thing in the world and he'll give him the best orgasm of his life if it's the last thing he ever does. Dean's just as intense about his mouth on Seth's dick as he is about drawing blood in the ring. Every part of his body working on overdrive for it. Hungry for it. Like it sets him on fire and he can't stop chasing that rush. It's not pain or destruction this time though. It's like making Seth feel good is another kind of victory to him. </p><p>It feels like time slows down, it's only been a couple minutes but it feels like years, Dean's fingers curling inside him, Dean's tongue lapping over his length. It's hard to stop himself from thrusting into Dean's mouth, the burning pressure viscous and heavy in his groin like all the blood has rushed to his dick. He's light-headed suddenly, like all the oxygen has been sucked out of the room. Like Dean's sucking all his capacity for complex thought out of him. Until there's nothing but his mouth and his soft skin under his hands and the shallow, even breaths he's taking through his nose as he hums around his dick and his long, warm fingers gripping against the tight heat of his insides and Dean, Dean, <i>Dean</i>.</p><p>When he knows he's right on the brink, he clenches his fingers in Dean's hair, swallows hard. "Dean, Dean, <i>fuck</i>, I'm gonna —" he gasps out urgently.</p><p>Dean carefully draws his fingers out and then replaces them with his mouth, swirls his tongue around his rim, licks inside purposeful and deliberate, and then in the one motion, licks a hot trail all the way up the underside of his dick, hand still stroking over him vigorously. And then he comes all over the sheets in thick stripes, and it feels like it lasts forever, the intense release razing through his body like a forest fire.</p><p>He feels unbalanced and hazy, vision blurring at the edges, like he's been knocked somewhere outside his own head by the force of this. His heart thuds against his ribcage, wondering if he's going to shatter into a million pieces because he's not enough to withstand all of this. And then Dean drops down next to him on the bed, presses his face into his shoulder, leaves a kiss there, and he feels himself inhabit his whole body again. Like Dean's touch is all he needs to keep him here in this moment, root him into the earth, so he doesn't turn to dust, ephemeral and translucent, and drift away on this vast, consuming feeling that feels so much larger than himself most of the time. Maybe it's not so impossible to carry when he's right here next to him to share the load. Seth reaches for Dean's hand, like a berth in the storm, and squeezes it for a moment before clutching it close right over his heart and a warm, familiar sensation unfurls through him from his chest to all his extremities. Like he's lying in a green, springtime field somewhere, limbs heavy and languid under the sun but perfectly content and free of any residual fear or tension.</p><p>They just lie there together for a while, coming down. He feels looser, tender and wrung-out, like he's been taken apart by Dean's fingers, his mouth, but a part of him is still greedy for more and he knows he can take Dean so good like this now, give him everything he needs, just swallow him up whole until it's impossible for them to ever truly separate. </p><p>He turns to look at him and Dean just gazes back at him softly, reaches out to gently brush his hair out of his face, and then he traces his fingers idly over his cheekbone and lips and jaw before he leans in to kiss him, slow and lingering and unrushed, like they have forever and they're only at the beginning now.</p><p>Seth wraps his arms around Dean's neck and gathers him close against his body, breathes against his hair and Dean moves his head down to press his mouth to his throat, lips lightly grazing against his sensitive skin.</p><p>And he thinks he can fall asleep just like this, wrapped up in his body, his scent, his careful, delicate touch — and then Dean bites his collarbone, hard and unexpected, and it makes his heart lurch again. And then Dean's fingers are trailing down over his ribs and then his abs and then around his hips to pull him in even closer and Seth's dick suddenly starts taking interest again when he was totally sure he was completely ruined and he wouldn't be able to come again for hours if not days. But Dean somehow always finds a way anyway. </p><p>Seth pulls away a fraction to look at him and shakes his head, laughing softly. "You're gonna be the death of me, you know."</p><p>Dean shrugs. "It's only fair."</p><p>"You know I can make you come a million times better than I did before," Seth tells him, voice low and bold.</p><p>"Oh, really?" Dean says, eyebrows shooting up.</p><p>"Yeah, my plans are legendary for a reason, you know," he says coolly.</p><p>"Well, maybe we can still make it work," Dean says casually. </p><p>"Yeah?" Seth says, their foreheads pressed together.</p><p>"Yeah," Dean breathes against his mouth.</p><p>"Okay," Seth tells him, quiet but sure.</p><p>They kiss again, Dean's arms clinging tight around his back, holding him in place, fingers tugging at the loose tangles in his hair. Seth moans against his mouth and slings a leg over Dean's body and hooks his knee around his hip, Dean's leg slipping in between his own and his hands fitting around his ass to mould them together.</p><p>He can feel that Dean's hard now acutely and he reaches between them and closes his fingers around him. Dean uses the opportunity to grind their hips together, the head of Dean's dick brushing against his own like livewires being struck together, and he sees a trail of sparks behind his eyelids.</p><p>He jerks his head away to look up into his eyes. "God, Dean, I want you inside me. <i>Now</i>," he says desperately.</p><p>"Yeah, okay," Dean says, licking his lips before swallowing, eyes wild and unfocused, and he looks almost dazed and unsteady himself for the first time.</p><p>They switch positions so Dean's lying flat on his back and Seth's above him, straddling his lap. Dean reaches around and slides his fingers back into him, keeping him open so he can line up his dick against his entrance and Seth can gradually sink down onto him.</p><p>He slides into Seth so easily, helped by all the lube and Dean stretching him for so long, that it feels like he was made for this. When he bottoms out, Seth just adjusts to the sudden fullness inside him for a moment before he slowly rotates his hips over him. </p><p>"Oh, <i>god</i>," Dean exhales, like it's already too much for him. But Seth just keeps the same steady rhythm, hips rolling from side to side and then front to back, like a wave, so he can feel Dean pressing against his insides. He could probably do this all day but he knows Dean's not gonna last long. He just wants to make it good for him, give him back some of what Dean gave to him, what he gives to him every single day just being here, and choosing him, and loving him. Letting Seth love him in return so the feeling doesn't tear him asunder from the inside with nothing to channel it all into.</p><p>He gradually stops the circular motion of his hips and instead slowly raises them off Dean's body, letting him slide almost all the way out before lowering himself back down, feeling Dean hitting deep inside him.</p><p>Dean groans as he clenches hard around him, fingers grasping at his hips to keep him in place, nails sinking into his tender flesh, probably leaving crescent marks behind. </p><p>He keeps going, building momentum until Dean's sliding in and out of him quickly and fluidly, their hips slamming into each other with each thrust. </p><p>Dean's hot and aching inside him, dying for release, and Seth's just enjoying the pleasant burn from the friction. He doesn't touch himself, his hands splayed across Dean's stomach in front of him, because he just wants to make Dean come right now but he can feel the pressure inside of him, Dean hitting his pleasure point over and over until he's almost hard again, and all his nerve endings are already awake and alight from before so he knows it won't take much before he falls apart.</p><p>He keeps riding him, gradually getting faster as the frame of the bed creaks a little under them, feeling sweat dripping off his neck and running down the slope of his back, legs burning from the exertion, and then he loses focus of the mechanics of what he's doing, muscle memory taking over, drowning in it, the feeling, the sounds, the utter surreality and rightness of Dean buried to the hilt deep inside him — and he catches Dean's eyes instead and Dean's looking up at him like he's forgotten about everything else too, like Seth is <i>everything</i> to him, his whole world. His eyes are glazed over like he's having some kind of fucking transcendental experience, like he's floating out of his body but it's not scary, it's the best feeling in the universe. Better than any temporary adrenaline rush he can find anywhere else that just burns you out after a while. </p><p>He knows now that this just gets better every time, the more intimately acquainted they get with each other's bodies, the more they learn and discover about each other. The longer they grow together, every part of their lives and homes and bodies intertwining inextricably. There's nothing about this that will ever lose its lustre or thrill. The closer they get, the more fascinating and irresistible Dean becomes to him. And he's never felt like that about anything else, always chasing after new, shiny, exciting things and outgrowing the constant and steady and familiar too quickly before they outgrew him. But Dean's always turned everything in his life upside down without even trying. Just by existing. He knows him better than anyone and he constantly surprises him, every single day, and Seth wouldn't trade this for anything. Not the whole wide world. He's familiar and he's new and he's everything, all at once.</p><p>He takes in the complete picture of Dean spread out under him, a few damp, stray curls cascading over his forehead, lips wet and plump and letting out soft, shaky gasps, dark bruises already blooming against the pale skin on his neck, flushed chest rising and falling rapidly, the muscles in his thighs and arms tight and straining, his skin shining with sweat. And it's so heady, the knowledge that he's left scars on Dean too, some of them permanent, and not all of them tied up in old, lingering regrets and guilt. Just like Dean's left marks on him, like the world's left on them. Like the sea carving out shapes in the rocks over hundreds of years, towering mountains disintegrating into sand, an underwater seismic wave altering the rotation of the earth, a giant crater in the desert from a meteorite that travelled across the galaxy that changes the natural terrain forever. Dean's all over him now, inside him, flowing through every bit of him, his body, his heart, all the deepest, darkest places no one else will ever see or feel. Maybe happiness is another kind of devastating impact that leaves a scar, the kind you don't ever want to fade with time, the kind that rearranges the landscape of your heart permanently into something bountiful and boundless that you never thought it could be. And he thinks his chest might burst if the raging fire between them doesn't kill him first. </p><p>"God, you're so beautiful," Seth murmurs, his breath caught in his lungs.</p><p>His hips stutter to a stop for a couple seconds as they're both suspended in that moment. Dean's hands travel from his ass to his waist, squeezing and pressing into his sides hard enough to leave fingerprint indents in their wake. Like he wants to feel his body, his warmth, to know he's real and solid and alive, made of flesh and blood, and he's not going to disappear from him again like a decaying, fallen leaf picked up and blown away on the wind. And then his fingers follow the knobs of his spine up to his shoulders, gripping them tight. </p><p>He pulls him down into a fierce kiss, Seth going weak and boneless against him as Dean holds him close and thrusts his hips up into him, at an unbridled, furious pace. And Dean's entire body tenses under him before he comes with a choked, guttural sound, spilling deep inside Seth like a shockwave that thunders through his body, everything swelling in his chest just crumbling and settling hot and thick in his gut. Seth just tucks his face into Dean's shoulder as he rides it out, still thrusting weakly into him, Dean's arms around him, his fingers stroking over Seth's hair, as his body rises and falls in the same rhythm as Dean's heavy breathing. And he knows even the slightest touch now will send him careening right over the edge. </p><p>Dean seems to sense that too and when he's adequately recovered and his limbs have regained their strength, he hastily lifts Seth's hips off of him and flips them over. And Seth can feel still-warm come spilling out of him onto the sheets but Dean just pins him to the bed and puts his mouth around him again, swallows him down deep, like he's unhinged his fucking jaw. And Seth just feels the flat of his tongue swiping along his dick and he comes with a sudden, violent force against the back of Dean's throat. He lets out a sharp cry that he can't hold in. Dean's actually still licking at him as he spills inside his mouth and his mind's too fuzzy to even wonder how the fuck he's doing what he's doing. </p><p>He swears his brain actually goes offline for a long moment as he just lies there, eyes wide open and staring at the ceiling, trying to get a grip on reality again. When he starts wading back out of the fog again, he realises his whole body's still shaking like he's been split apart by tiny fault lines running all the way through him. But when he raises his head to look at Dean, he just feels like he's been put back together.</p><p>He's grinning like a madman with come running down his chin into his beard, eyes lighting up with pure delight and ecstasy, and Seth thinks he'd fucking die for this man if he asked.</p><p>His head falls to rest against Seth's hip, panting hard, his whole body heaving like he's just run a marathon, looking up at him.</p><p>"You're really fucking hot," he manages to get out, voice hoarse.</p><p>"You're <i>insane</i>," Seth sputters at him, fingers curling around the hinge of his jaw.</p><p>"Hey, <i>you</i> started it," Dean retorts with a shrug, slowly hoisting himself up off the mattress like it takes a lot of effort.</p><p>Dean covers his body with his own, kisses him soft and warm and eager, and it's like a gentle wave rolling over him, washing everything new and clean and bright. Like sunlight on a brand new day. When he pulls away to look down at him, he looks awake and alive and reinvigorated. <i>His</i> Dean, but happy and glowing, everything he wants him to be.</p><p>It staggers him again, that he contains tsunamis that can drown the whole world and he's also capable of infinite tenderness. For the things he wants to keep and hold carefully in his cupped hands, to rescue from the flood. It's like they've built an island for just the two of them within the midst of all the hurricanes and violence swirling around them, safe and sheltered from the past and the unknowns of the outside world, and nothing can touch them here. Seth winds his body around Dean's, firm and unyielding and strong, shoulders built to carry heavy weights his whole life, and he knows nothing can uproot them. They can outlast all the disasters and calamities and uncertainty that life wants to throw in their path. Maybe they might falter for a moment but they'll always survive it. They're as solid as the forces that keep the earth together. And they'll always be drawn back in to each other, over and over again, crashing together like tectonic plates, creating fire and energy and life, creating new lands, creating new mountains to climb, however far away the ocean takes them.</p>
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